Substitute compliments rock! ( Connectedness in class - part 2 )

Getting compliments is nice.

Getting them from your own teacher is very nice.

Getting them from a substitute really rocks!

Jimmy is new in class

So am I that morning.

His table is next to the teachers table.

I know it's for a reason, mostly not for fun.

Jimmy doesn't pay attention to me, unless I specifically ask for it.

He does pay attention to the kids in class and Ronny in particular.

He tells them what to say and do, mostly what NOT to say and do.

I hear words I don't want to hear in class and try to stop it.

I manage to stop the class from responding to Jimmy

Jimmy keeps on doing his talking and shouting stuff

I give a thumbs up when Jimmy is quiet and looks my way

I manage to walk by all the kids and tell them they're doing great

Then I see Jimmy working for a few minutes

I walk towards him and tell him:

"I see you're working hard. You're doing great!"

"I'm doing great. I'm doing great." 

It was Jimmy's immediate response to my words.

Jimmy is new in class

He get's compliments from his teacher, I'm sure of that

And from his parents, I'm sure of that too

But today a new person told him he was able to do something great.

I like to give classes 'free time' when they have been working hard

I was able to compliment Jimmy and all kids in class

I started with 5 minutes 'free time' even before an hour had passed!

"Miss, this is so much fun! This rocks!"

(Proud as a peacock: earning marbles, it's the teachers way of complimenting the class.)

Getting compliments is nice.

Getting them from your own teacher is very nice.

Getting them from a substitute really rocks!

Jimmy still had his moments of needless interfering

I had to guide him throughout the day,

but he sure did earn his free time!

I was glad to have seen his tiny moments of 'doing great'

Jimmy was so much more at ease throughout the day

Complimenting him on those tiny moments, sure paid off!

Ella de Jong

Trainer - Teacher - Writer - Coach

www.elladejong.com 

A tough day at school. What tools to use?

Dear little Emily,

I see what you do,

I have to walk towards you.

I hear your small voice,

I have to bend forward to you.

I feel your tension

I have to lead you.

Dear Emily,

You don't know me

I'm your temporary teacher.

You don't know what to do.

You are only five years of age!

Well, you do know ... 

These are your tools for dealing with it:

You aren't listening. You do 'what ever comes up in your mind'. You tease other children. You are constantly checking whether I see what you are doing. 

Dear Emily,

I understand it is difficult for you!

I have to walk towards you and speak to you in a fierce voice telling you to stop teasing.

I have to bend over to you and summit you to come directly, like all other children.

I have to take your hand and guide you towards the door where everybody is waiting.

At the end of the day we are both tired.

We say goodbye and 'perhaps we'll meet again'.

That's it.

Only two days we've been in each others lives.

Dear little Emily,

I was so happy to see you one week later!

I was teaching an other class.

You saw me in the hall and walked to me.

"I know you!" and while I recognised you and we both smiled, you came closer and we hugged. 

Such short contacts. Such warm connections in spite of difficult behaviour. Those "wrong tools" ... you can't help it. 

Ella de Jong

Temporary teacher - writer - trainer 'Energizing Communication with Troubled Youth' - youth counsellor - life coach    www.elladejong.com